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Sunday, May 31, 2009
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11:46 PM
I have no frickin' idea what i'm doing. fucking pissed at what i'm feeling but there's nothing i can do about it. or no one to turn to. only 1 week left and i can't take it anymore.
Monday, May 25, 2009
cause i was bored. @
11:08 PM
i'm not liking this semester. things going past too quickly. it's gonna be crazy. and people are leaving too fast. i'll be left behind here...for 2 months. =( can't wait for next week to be gone. but at the same time i don't want to. cause you'll be leaving soon and it'll be different without you.
Sunday, May 24, 2009
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7:51 PM
another one of those days when i feel so helpless. only less than a week to my submission dates and i'm panicking. so much stuff to do. alot more stuff to do even after all of these work is handed in. it's driving me absolutely nuts. this is the time when i feel that i have taken up too much project and starting to regret them. but i've got no other way out now. it's too late. everything is too late.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
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7:56 PM
all these stuff that are going on is driving me insane!! i've got loads of assignments to finish up by next week, but i'm not looking forward to the things going on after that. 1 intense month of filming will be damn crazy. i don't know if i can handle it. i really wanna go back. =( i need some fresh air and a change of environment.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
i'm invisible @
7:55 PM
cause nobody cares about my opinions or what i have to say. make me pissed over nothing. waste of my time today. i'm just a shadow.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
fucker. @
3:17 PM
i'm sorry mr. director, but you've got a fucking idiot mr. producer who doesn't do his own job but push them to others to do. once you have an incapable producer, you are fucked, no matter how awesome your script is. if your project doesn't get through, blame it all on your producer, who doesn't even give a damn, cause he's not interested. fucking pissed at being forced to do work that is not in my scope of area. why the fuck am i supposed to give you a list of props and estimates so that you can work out your budget?? you are supposed to gimme a fucking budget so that i can decide where to spend the money on the props!! what the hell is the producer for then? just sit and wait for people to give you quotations and then you just give some random budget?! why is the director supposed to tell me about a contact who has contacts about the wigs we might be using? you are supposed to be the one to tell me that!! and you can ask if the director told me about her. and i don't even know how the heck we are supposed to do the wigs shit when you didn't gimme pictures of the people i'm supposed to find wigs for!! so i'm just supposed to guess their hair color eh? how did i 'sign on' to be in art department and end up doing wardrobe shits also? that props and costumes guy is not even helping. and how am i supposed to handle all these shit that is thrown at me and i dunno what is going on. i wanna give up on this project. cause the damn ass producer is so useless. and it's affecting every department on the project. so should stop giving excuses and move your ASS!   START DOING YOUR FUCKING JOB AND BE A PRODUCER!!!
Wednesday, May 06, 2009
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12:58 AM
all that is running through my mind is 'what the fuck'. questioning every single move i make. every move is a mistake. i'm a mistake. tell me i'm wrong. I'm just a kid and life is a nightmare
I'm just a kid, I know that its not fair
Nobody cares, cause I'm alone and the world is
Having more fun than me
What the fuck is wrong with me?
Don't fit in with anybody
How did this happen to me?
Wide awake I'm bored and I can't fall asleep
And every night is the worst night ever
Tuesday, May 05, 2009
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11:25 PM
with everything that is going on in my head and around me. i'll be going crazy soon. this week is going to be one crazy week. and the rest of the weeks that's following up. more group meetings, more location scouts and more fucked ups. sick and tired of too much stuff.
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1:06 PM
DON'T KEEP ME WAITING - SHARLEEN SPITERI Pull up to the front, you see the club glow You see a man at the door then you say hello And the beating in my heart, music starts to grow It's time to step up now Even though I think I'm scared to dance Gotta get a drink and pour it down Try to move around now to the sound It's time to stand up, stand up, stand up, stand up Oooh, why do you always keep me waiting? And now I'm falling for you Ooh, out on the floor we keep on moving I can't let you out of my sight Got this picture in my mind now that you're my friend Brush against your hair, it smells like peppermint Can you read those messages that I sent? It's time to step up now Even though I think I'm scared to dance Gotta get a drink and pour it down Try to move around now to the sound It's time to stand up, stand up, stand up, stand up Oooh, why do you always keep me waiting? And now I'm falling for you Ooh, out on the floor we keep on moving I can't let you out of my sight Do you wanna get close? Do you wanna be mine? Now you're standing here by my side Do you wanna get close? Do you wanna be mine? Now you're standing here right by my side Na, na, na, na, na, na, oh, oh, oh Na, na, na, na, na, na, oh, oh, oh Na, na, na, na, na, na, oh, oh, oh Na, na, na, na, na, na, oh, oh Oooh, why do you always keep me waiting? And now I'm falling for you Ooh, out on the floor we keep on moving I can't let you out of my sight Na, na, na, na, na, na, oh, oh, oh Na, na, na, na, na, na, oh, oh, oh (I can't let you out of my sight) Na, na, na, na, na, na, oh, oh, oh Na, na, na, na, na, na, oh, oh, oh No, don't keep me waiting (Na, na, na, na, na, na, oh, oh, oh) No, don't keep me waiting (Na, na, na, na, na, na, oh, oh, oh) No, don't keep me waiting (Na, na, na, na, na, na, oh, oh, oh) No, don't keep me waiting (Na, na, na, na, na, na, oh, oh, oh) No, don't keep me waiting (Na, na, na, na, na, na, oh, oh, oh) Na, na, na, na, na, na, oh, oh, oh Na, na, na, na, na, na, oh, oh, oh Na, na, na, na, na, na, oh, oh, oh
Monday, May 04, 2009
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9:14 PM
 when someone said 'i love you' to me and all i can say in reply is 'thanks'. and asked if i felt the same way about him, all i can say is 'i don't know how to answer you that'. i'm sorry. =/ maybe it's just that i don't know how to feel love anymore. 
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12:52 AM
woohoo! i yahoo-ed my name and found a short story written about me!! and it's pretty good actually. hehe. http://www.southern-style.com/short%20stories/Jean%20Ann.htm and i should be heading to bed cause it's 3am and i gotta wake up at 8 plus. Hello, is it me you're looking for?
'Cause I wonder where you are and I wonder what you do
Are you somewhere feeling lonely or is someone loving you?
Tell me how to win your heart for I haven't got a clue
But let me start by saying, I love you
Saturday, May 02, 2009
i miss you @
9:16 PM
yay!! i just talked to my mum and she says i can don't go for my graduation!! cause i will help them save quite abit of money. hoho! it's gonna be another graduation that i don't have a visual picture. i just don't find a point in sitting amongst a few hundred people, only waiting for my name to be called in the next 2 or 3 hours. i'm a restless person. i can't sit still for long. as long as i have the paper it's fine. i don't need a picture of me holding the paper in a long gown that doesn't fit me. i missed my poly graduation as i was having a holiday somewhere, hong kong maybe...and probably gonna miss this one too. the crappy thing is, my birthday is end of nov and i might want to go back for my 21st. which means i will miss the dec/feb grad, unless i fly back again just for that. which is gonna costs alot more for the flight tix and accommodations while i'm here. but then again, i wanna stay here awhile longer just to explore places before going back. but my birthday comes in the way...kinda. just cause i grad uni probably the mid of nov and flying back straight after, i might not come back here again. =( hey yo indian bitch in train. stay away from me. there's a freaking huge space INFRONT of you! and you have no right to hold into my arm! you freak! i'm not a freaking pole!! i got damn pissed when heading home. not being racist or anything. but i was just damn irritated. she kept pushing into my side and i didn't have space to move back cause a guy was behind me and i didn't want to hit him with my backpack. she just kept pushing back into me for nothing!! wtf. i glared at her so many times but she just didn't get my point. argh. she even step on my shoe cause she stood too close to me. and then when stopping at my station, which she was also getting out, she wanted to 'slide' past me and at that point, she held on to my arm!!! omg...i almost slapped her at that point. but then seeing that she's also trying to get out at that station, i decided that i will stalk her and act really suspicious and walk really close behind her to make her feel scared. she did turn and look at her a few times but i just walked really close to her. and then she veered off to the residences, so i walked off to the other side. god. i feel damn pissed man. and really really tired. slept at 6.30am in the morning...stayed up the whole night 'chatting' and watching movies. haha. and now i feel like i've lost touch with some people around me. even though we are so close, we've drifted, hopefully just for these few days when we are all busy with work. take care come home safe good night
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